������Ƶֱ��

Beginning or restarting college is a perfect example of culture shock.

Every environment has its own culture made up of people, systems, and even language. We may speak the same language, but there is a special vocabulary when it comes to university classes, understanding registration, figuring out financial aid and housing. There are new words, processes, and ways to learn all the time! This is especially true for first-generation students; those who are first in their family to attend university. The best thing everyone can do is to ask questions about what something means or how to do something. Your peers, professors and advisors are truly happy to answer. It is almost guaranteed someone has the exact same question; be the brave one to ask. Especially at Fresno Pacific—you are in a caring, personalized, and understanding environment.

The best thing about college is the new relationships.

They can also be one of the hardest things! You are going to college with a clean relational slate—no one knows you, and you don’t know anyone. This can be refreshing, but sometimes hard not to be known. You are meeting new people from different backgrounds: this is both beautiful and shocking. You might think things like, “Wow, that person’s family does it that way?” or “Oh, that person is really outgoing, I am not like that,” or “That person seems to know what they are doing and I don’t.” Remember that God has created you uniquely, so be yourself, and if it takes you more time to meet people and open up, that is okay!

I remember when I moved in with my first college roommate. She talked to her mom every day, could study and chat at the same time, and got annoyed with my long, nightly routine. Conversely, I only talked to my parents once a week, and I needed complete silence to study. I became annoyed at her talking to me during study time, so I ended up in the library doing my homework. None of my or my roommate’s habits were moral failures—they were just differences. But it was all shocking as we learned to live with each other that first semester and realized that it was fine that we were the way we were. We didn’t have to be like the other person. And we didn’t have to get upset with them because they weren’t like us.   

We humans appreciate knowing what is normal—I always want to know that I am normal! 

So what is normal for this culture shock of university? Take a look at the “W” culture shock curves as shown in Zeller, W. J. and Mosier, R. (1993). Culture shock and the first-year experience Journal of College and University Student Housing 23(2). Study it. This is what is completely normal:

Do you feel excited (and nervous) to experience college and all the academic and social activities it has to offer? Normal. After a couple of weeks or months, do you feel like the excitement has worn off and you are not so sure that you belong? Normal. Do you have a pit in your stomach and miss home sometimes? Normal. When you start missing home and questioning whether you made the right choice to be where you are, you are in the first dip in the “W” of culture shock. Then it gets a bit better as you move up to the “initial adjustment” stage. But it is not going to be 100% better because you are changing, and that takes work and time. You might even go into a mental isolation stage where you withdraw from others. Normal. But don’t stay there.

After a semester and some hurt feelings, my roommate and I were okay with doing some things together and some things apart.

I started appreciating the fact that her family was so close that they had to talk every day, and she got used to my being away to study. We both found other friends to hang out with, but we grew to be good roommates for the time. We never lived together again, but we remain good friends twenty-five years later! All these hard relationships, routines, systems, and new language add to who we are and help us to mature.

Though my first cultural transition happened when I started university in the 90’s, I also personally rode that “W” of cultural transitions while studying abroad for a semester in Spain, two years of grad work in Mexico, and eight years living and working in China. I know that working through tough transitions like starting university or moving to a different country can be challenging, but that process is worth it for all the personal growth and learning that comes after.